How often we forget how dependent we are. I, for one, fight for self-identity everyday. Funny how it's only when I let go of that silly notion that my life brightens. I am not someone alone. I am part of a group, a group of groups, a tiny contributor to a whole beyond my vision. And in this place I find identity.

As a mother I get joy in my son, but survive the afternoon because of his daily naps. I cope with life and keep my living situation in a large way by my husband, who is part of a company, who depends on customers and caters to them, and depends on each person in the company, including me.

My distant family is a huge encouragement, especially when they send mail, provided by my happy friendly mail lady everyday, supported by her postal branch and co-workers, supplied by the Federal Government, sponsored by our country collectively.

I can afford my son's growing habits only because of my in-law's generosity and thrift stores, one of which started by a loving family in town with a vision, bound together with the camaraderie of the staff, and filled by every household in town with a heart to give.

I warm our house by building fires of wood, prepared by family and friends of the past numerous years, and gathered from the woods of our and neighbors' land, neighbors who, for the sake of free removal of fallen wood, were open to us invading their property with trucks, boots and chainsaws.

My husband, son and I have strength to work, to grow, to think from the nutrition we consume from day to day. I can attribute this in large to vegetables; vegetables from the store, the farmer's market, home gardening, greenhouse plants; grown in dozens of countries or states or towns by me, my family, my friends, my neighbors near and far, and people I've never known and will never know... Nor would these vegetables have found their way on our table had it not been the respective influences we received as children.

I look out of a beautiful old farmhouse, on a shoveled walk, a limestone driveway, cleared yard, cultivated field, and well fed birds, all of which I owe to others, and I commit once again to the calling of one among many. I rejoice in this ocean of blessings, and contribute to the blessings of others.

I don't know about you, but I got a little out of shape over the holidays...then I went on vacation and got sick as well (perfect circumstances for exercising, right?) Then we came home to a still snow-covered Wisconsin. So much for biking or strollering. You may be wondering how a blog built on positivity is dwelling so much on this depressing history. Well, I've learned that (as the song goes) "para fazer un samba con beleze, e preciso un bocado de tristeze": to have a samba with beauty, it is necessary to have a little sadness. In other words, how would I be able to portray the ecstasy of today without providing the perspective I'm coming from? And this state of affairs led me to a bit of depression and a whole lot of lethargy.

Such were the last several days for me. But thanks to my mother-in-law's letting me join her YMCA membership, today my state has finally changed. Eddy and I got up, ate an energizing egg breakfast, and were off for fun and adventure at the Y. He got to play and climb, eat and socialize with his long missed friends while I warmed up on a rowing machine then hit the pool. 75 lengths (3 lengths over a mile - woohoo!) and a shower later and we left, exchanging our varying happy experiences. Being a 2-year-old, his included a successful potty trip (good boy!) and mine included alternate stroke breathing and down to 27.4 lbs on the scale! =) Now I have energy, Eddy is contented and asleep, and the day looks all the brighter. Let's see what I can get done today now, with my added pep.

P.S. It is so worth it.

A delightful morning equals ready to leave the night before, saying goodbye and packing the family into a car at 4:00am, sleeping a long time with a willing husband at the wheel, waking up as we drive into the most beautiful sunrise, pleasant conversation with car noises and a sleeping toddler in the back, and radio. Country radio.

I am not a regular country music listener, but with no other choice, I let the positive upbeat sounds drown out the sometimes otherwise lyrics and add a happy background to an already pleasant scene with my husband. What better way to enjoy music and life if you are forced to take it as it comes =)

On a day when we were supposed to be traveling back to home and hearth, my husband and I were swept along with a big group of local skiers to Beaver Creek and my first ski of the season. What memories and joys came alive on the slopes that day! Even a mogul covered black diamond could not stop me on that day, and the snow was good and abundant. In a life lacking skis, a whole day at a first rate ski resort is sheer bliss.

In all my grumblings about leaving later and later and plans changing, I've overlooked the great joy of the last hours of vacation. What can be better than an old fashioned candy store in a pretty walking mall with Grandma and my wide eyed 2-year-old son who's never seen so much candy in his life =)

A 2-block walk by myself to the natural grocery store is delightful enough. And still unexpected fun awaits at every corner... a shiny green VW bug greeted me on my way AND I had a phone camera to capture the moment.

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth...God is love...God demonstrated His love toward us in that...Christ died for us...how shall He not with him also freely give us all things?...all things work together for good to them that love God...if God be for us, who shall be against us?...for I am persuaded that nothing will be able to separate us from the love of God.

Positive: 8 a: having a good effect: FAVORABLE: b: marked by optimism

A conversation with my brother about life recently brought some long-standing questions to the surface of my mind: why do I, without trying, always see the bad about everything around me? How can my life be so dark, when someone else with the same circumstances think of every part of work and life as a grand vacation?

He said he has learned to only notice the bright side of things...a point of view I've always thought of as shallow, silly, unreal. Maybe that's my problem. Upon looking on the memorized phrases of Scripture above, I gotta admit, there is huge amounts of positivity in the Bible. Of course, the point I always fall on is that you can't fool yourself either. God teaches us to look at the good AND the bad realistically. But, what would happen if I gave this positivity thing a try? I think God has given me plenty of blessings enough to fill one blog. Perhaps I'll find out I've been living in paradise all along...I just needed to take off the dark glasses =)