Five of us from BioLawn (Dan the boss / Charlie the sales & tech / Gayle the secretary / Naomi the finacier / Eddy the mascot) drove to St. Paul Park for a visitation and memorial service today.  It was packed.  We were the only ones there who knew no one else there (except one of Ken's sons we'd met once and another ex-BioLawn employee who knew Ken came as well).  Sisters and brothers and parents and aunts and uncles and cousins and college friends and rehab friends and childhood friends and all their spouses and children and friends were there.  The service itself was all right.  A few people stood and talked about their friendships with Ken (including our Charlie -- thank you). No family stood up.  The sermon was good -- really close to being a good Christian message. A very good practical message to Ken's loved ones.  We found out much deeper about Ken's addiction-riddled history while we were there.  Apparently there are still hurt feelings.  The deacon spoke on forgiveness.  Jesus forgave quickly and readily.  We should too.  The rest of the service was lame but we got through it.  The whole event was very awkward.  But it was nice to see the crowds of people who loved Ken, and whom Ken loved -- his legacy, so to speak.  They banded together and cried together (Ken's mother hugged and cried with Dan / Ken's sister hugged and told us Ken really really really loved us / Ken's aunt said what a drastic positive change Ken's life took when he started working for us and making "those new friends" who were only us).  Apparently we didn't know the same Ken the rest of them knew -- the Ken with issues he could never seem to get over...until last year.  But it was still good to see the dozens and dozens of people who knew the same guy we knew.  Because he was the same guy -- just in different seasons of his life.  We got to see him on the top (which makes Daniel OH so much sadder), happy, confident, gaining success in his relationships. But everyone saw his compassion, his love for children, especially his own, his humility, his openness, and his hard work ethic: things we cherished.  This huge crowd of people love and miss him like we do.  It was good to hug his sisters and get to know them a little bit.  I wish we could've gone to the dinner afterward to be more relaxed with his family, but perhaps I'll stop by again in a couple days and see how they are doing.  Ken is the invisible bond that brings all these people together in love and tears and hugs.  Loved ones make it worth it.

But it was still an exhausting day.